By Nolawi
11 May 2014
(Bernos.com )_I am not an expert, however, I’ve learned a few things over the years. Sure, it might seem like I am a talker and not an observer but I do listen. A roughguesstimation assures me that about a quarter of my conversations are about dating.
This is a topic everyone seems to be interested in. Even family members are asking questions, Meche nuew YeMe’tagebaw? (?? ?? ???????) Maybe two years after I meet her! How can I ask her to marry me before I meet her? Esti tinesh common sense people! I am not David Blaine.
Male friends that are single complain about the etrete(????) of female companions or about how the ones available are Guregna? The more sophisticated say that the ladies are stuck up. Some that are in relationships complain about how they are being treated or the girls they missed opportunities with. I guess some girls do not shop in the single men aisle!
Female friends complain about the lack of eligible bachelors around. Hmm, they say that straight to my face. I didn’t know that I was ineligible. Anyhow, have you been to the club lately? Haven’t you seen the number of guys standing 3 feet in front of the bar with their Heinekens. Beself eyetebeqush nuew (???? ?????? ??)
In the name of this article, in order to help my brothers and sisters, I started doing research. What’s really going on? And I think I have narrowed the answer to the question mentioned in the title.
First thing first, I have to do my own real life test. At a local Ethiopian restaurant I frequent, I saw a girl that has I’ve had my eye on & pretty sure vice versa. Sorrytinish guregna negn. I thought since I was somewhat sure, my chances were over 50%. Take a shot Nolawi! What’s the worst that could happen?
The only problem was that since I barely knew her, I didn’t know how she liked to be asked? Begu’arow woyes Befit’lefit! I called her over and asked her to tell me how she liked to be asked out? She smiled and told me that she like straight shooters.
So I shot and missed. Thus, REAL LIFE EXPERIEMENT ONE brought one question to and end. Either my radars need to get repaired or that’s not how you ask Ethiopian girls?
To quote myself, I once wrote:
Chigru eko wonde tef’To say’Hone Eshi Yemetil Set Tef’Ta nuew (??? ?? ??? ??? ???? ?? ???? ?? ??? ??)
You see in Ethiopia, there is such a thing called megderder (??????). I doubt if they even have a word in English for it. All this time I thought it applied only to Injera, but it applies in everything. It is rude to say ‘YES’ the first time; in Ethiopia that is.
The Answer
Depending on the size of your ego; you have to ask her again and again till your jaw drops and she says ‘YES’ OR never ever give her a chance to say ‘NO.’ Meaning, do not ever ever ask her out directly.
Avoid a question the can be answered with a ‘NO’ as a negative! There are several ways to approach without bruising your ego. Ask her if she busy Friday night. She will most likely say ‘NO’ as she is prone to do and that she would most likely want to hear what you have in mind before she turns you down as she is prone to do. If she says ‘YES’ she is busy; you still have Saturday and Sunday. If she is busy the whole weekend she might actually be busy, so ask her again next week. I am open to hear some other ideas from the Don Juan Abebes.
Goodluck Melkam Eidel!